Friday, February 29, 2008

Random Thought of the Day

I'm sitting here enjoying a soft pretzel. It's a Friday tradition in this office, but I don't usually partake. (I enjoy them, but often times I'm not here on Friday or just don't feel like having one...)
In this part of the country, Philly really, it is tradition to put mustard on them. Usually a fairly good dark yellow mustard, but most people end up just using plain, old, boring yellow. Some weeks I do, some I don't.
Today I did.
The random thought:
"I used to make fun of my brother for eating 'mustard sandwiches' (two pieces of white bread with mustard in between), but here I am, essentially eating the same thing... a bread products with nothing but mustard on it." (I'd removed most of the salt as most days it's just too much...)

So, with that bit of randomness, I shall leave you to go work with a couple of the guys here in the office on using the software. This has been a busy training week for me!

Peace to all and may you enjoy a bit of randomness from time to time.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Run Away Yarn?

Well, I've finished up training our two Indian programmers. It was quite a lot of fun. I'm not sure I've really enjoyed a training session this much in quite a while. They asked great questions and are fun people to begin with.
Last night, most of software development took them out to dinner. I knew about it Tuesday, but didn't realize I was invited as well. So... since Gak was closing, I went too. It was a good time. I think this is the first really social thing I've done since Michelle came up for New Year's, and I was sick at the time. Oh, wait... we did go over to Kat's one night and played games with everyone. I'm trying to remember if that was before or after New Year's though. (I'm sure I could look it up in past posts, but I'm being lazy...) It was a good time. Rick and Uday also came. It was good to see them again. They both seem to be doing well.
Of course, because I went out last night, that means that any projects I was thinking about working on last night didn't happen. That's OK though. I'm waiting until Saturday to try and attack the sleeves again. I need daylight and brain power. The few other things I'm working on should go quickly. Especially once I get the yarn back for Mom's afghan. I really want to get it done in the next few weeks so she'll have it by her birthday. That and it'll still be cold enough to want to use it! It won't take me all that long to do, it's a fairly quick and easy pattern.
My friend Chelsea (see links) is taking a speech class in college right now. I'm sure if I'd had an entire class on it in school, I'd have been terrified and done horribly. I really don't mind speaking (look at what I do for a living!) but having to do "formal" speeches and things like that, I'm not very good at. It's the whole prep thing. Just look at how badly my senior seminar(s) went for my degree. Of course, I didn't really have topics I was interested in... so that made it even more challenging in my little world.
Anyhow, back to Chelsea. Go read her outline for this speech. It's sounding pretty good. She's talking about the social aspects of knitting. It's true, and it doesn't just hold for knitting. Crocheters are that way too. And this isn't anything new. Don't forget all the church sewing/quilting circles of the past, and the prayer shawl ministries of today. It's not just little old lades doing it either. Fiber arts of all kinds are becoming popular and trendy for all ages. I'm glad. There is just something about having a hobby that makes things, that expresses your creativity. Mind you, stamp and coin collecting and things like that are great hobbies too and have their own communities, but there's something about making something tangible with your time. It gives you a whole new window on the world. It makes you feel useful and productive and you get a real sense of accomplishment when you learn something new or finish a project. It makes your heart swell to bursting when you gift someone with something you've made and they can't thank you enough. (Although, almost every crafter has had the exact opposite experience... putting in all the time and effort into a hand made gift only to have it looked down on and tossed aside... that hurts a lot.)
I'm not going to go into all the evidence that older people with hobbies that engage the brain live longer, happier, healthier lives. I'm not going to say I'd rather go hang out with my mom in the sewing room helping mend or alter things than sit in front of the TV.... I'm not here to preach about the evils of TV and turning off your brains.... so I won't.
Anyhow, I'm rambling again. I had a different post in my head when I went to bed last night, but after reading Chelsea's blog, I guess I had to share my own thoughts and support her thesis. I wish her all the luck in the world with this class and this presentation.
Peace to all and may you all have something that keeps your hands and your mind busy and brings a smile to your face.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

This Crazy World

Just a quick post this morning before I head off to the office. I'm still working with the two from India. They're really good people and asking really good questions. They are really beginning to see things from a customer point of view of why things are the way they are. Today is going to be hard though, because it's not just customer use that needs to be explained, but some reg stuff as well. Hopefully I won't melt their brains or mine too badly. But, like I said, they're good people and friendly.
One thing I forgot to mention on Monday was an email I got from my oh-so-wonderful, Fortune-500 company... They messed up a lot of people's W-2s and have given us corrected ones. They messed up the federal and state withholding on the W-2s themselves. Great. If a big company like mine can't get it right.... If we'd waited two weeks to get the taxes done, it wouldn't be a problem. Now I've got to make another appointment with H&R Block to see what we need to do to fix it. I'm glad I didn't mail out the tax payments yet. (Although, federal was only $25, it is local that's killing us...)
Everything seems to be going well with Gak and the job. He had off yesterday. Friday is inventory, so that'll be fun. And yes, he still has to work Saturday close. Maybe he'll have Sunday off. Hopefully he'll have next Saturday either off or opening.

On a non work-related subject, what is it about second sleeves and set-in sleeves? It took me two tries to get the second sleeve right, and I thought it might be easier to set in sleeves in crochet... not with this pattern. Ugh. I tried to do it Monday night, but didn't get very far because I was too tired to line everything up right and not have it move around on me, even with some pinning. Maybe I'll get it right tonight, as Gak's closing again. (I like crocheting when he's not home... I don't feel guilty for ignoring him and we get little enough time together some weeks as it is...)

Anyhow, I've got to get dressed and get into work.
Peace to all and may your work be interesting.

Monday, February 25, 2008

Where Was I...?

Well, this weekend was a bit of a bummer. It slowly but surely turned into one of those weekends. It wasn't drop dead horrible, but it sure wasn't a good one.
Friday night Gak only had to work an extra hour, which was good. If not, I'm not sure he would have gotten a break at all that day. Talk about a grumpy troll! We ended up going out to dinner to Red Robbin. I have a love/hate relationship with that place. Their food is sooooo good, but it is sooooo bad for you! It was OK when the closest one was up by the airport. Then the one by the new movie theater opened. Now, now there's one in the same parking lot as Target. I am doomed! We've been trying to keep it to special occasions, but these days, pay day sounds pretty special some weeks. Needless to say a little bit of food therapy did Gak and I both some good. (Their bruchetta chicken sandwich is sooo yummy! Of course, I didn't eat both halves of the roll, so I missed out on some of the flavors... but that's OK.) We also went to Target, since we were right there. We splurged, just a little. We got a new dragon, who is sitting on the printer at the moment, and I got a new keyboard. I'd been looking at "gaming" keyboards since about October or so. Well, they had one of the ones I liked in stock and it was at a good price. Gak told me to buy it. I'm really happy with it. The real test will be tomorrow night though, when I take it for a spin on a raid. (That and full 6-person groups is why I wanted the programmable key pad on the side... to make things just that much quicker...) Oh, it is a Logitec G11. It doesn't have all the bells and whistles as some, which is just fine. It has the bells and whistles I wanted.
Saturday originally Gak was going to have to work, then he traded with Joe, but Joe had a family commitment and had to trade back. We were originally going to go to Yuengling Brewery with Kat and some others, but since Gak had to be at work by 1 (2 since he worked that extra hour...) it just wasn't going to work. That made us both cranky. This isn't the first thing we've had to turn down because of him having to close. I mean, he's had to close every Saturday since before the end of the year.... It did not help things any that he got yelled at by Tallon when he got there. Some of it was justified. But Gak isn't some 16-year-old teenager who won't listen to anyone and you have to yell at to get them to understand. He's 35 and understands responsibility and will own up to his mistakes when they're pointed out to him. It really didn't help that some of the things he was being yelled at about weren't in his control. I mean, something not getting done that should have, fine, that's a problem... only problem is the supplies for said project didn't come in until Wednesday, when Gak wasn't even at work! (He had Wednesday and Thursday off...) This put Gak into such a royally bad mood. He was barely sociable for two days!
Sunday Gak had to work again as well. This just kept him cranky. It's a good thing I love him and knew it wasn't me he was cranky with. (I did have to remind myself not to be a bitch and gripe at him about nothing a few times last night though....) I think he started using full sentences and paragraphs sometime this morning.
Meanwhile, I didn't get a whole lot accomplished this weekend. I did attempt to find most of my desk... at least getting rid of all the crap hiding behind my monitor and printer. Now I just have to deal with the rest of it... I will get it under control one of these days. I have to, it's in the living room for all to see.

Today was much better than the weekend, all things considered. (Other than the fact I haven't slept right in a few nights... might as well get used to that fact...) I did the 1-hour glucose test this morning. I had the lemon-lime drink. It really wasn't that bad. It tasted like very flat sprite. I like sprite. I like sprite with bubbles even better. I'll get the results back in 7-10 days. They also drew blood to check my iron levels as well. I hope I don't have to go onto iron pills... I really don't need to add that to the list.
This week we have a couple of people from our development team in India here. They're good people. I'm working with them today and tomorrow on the software from a user's point of view. They've both been working on the software for about 4 years, but as developers, they don't have to know how it works in the "real world" to do their jobs. Hopefully, by learning how it's used and why there are certain requirements, they'll be able to make it even better. It went quite well actually. Hopefully tomorrow we'll be able to wrap up my portion of things.
Apparently today Gak got a chance to talk with Tallon. It apparently went well, because the message he left me on my phone wasn't pissy and cranky, but relieved. I truly hope they worked some things out. Gak really does like that job for the most part and really does it well most days. He's a good guy and will gladly fix honest mistakes once he knows what's wrong. He's a gentle soul. You don't need to beat him into the ground over things. Tallon is young, but he'll learn. (I say apparently because it's Monday and Gak is at Warhammer, so I won't see him for a couple of hours yet...)

Well, I'm off to get some crocheting done and poke around at a few things. I've got a really cool project in the works that I can't wait to show you. Mom knows what it is and she's going to help me with it. I hope it turns out as cool as I think it will. I know Gak's kinda excited about it too.

Peace to all and may your weekends be good, and your bosses have brains that work from time to time. (I know, I ask a lot some days...)

Friday, February 22, 2008

Nursery Surprises

The world works in mysterious ways. I'm quietly panicking about getting Boo's room all set up and Mom is finishing going through Gram's paperwork including some old insurance policies. Well, Mom found a goldmine of sorts today. Gram had taken out a policy on Mom when she was a pre-schooler. It still existed as unclaimed property with the state, and Mom was able to claim it.
Guess what she wants to spend her mini-windfall on? Furniture for Boo!
I can't begin to say what all the emotions are.
There's relief that this is possible.
There's amazement that this money even existed.
There's gratitude for having a Mom that loves me, her son-in-law and her grandson so much. I mean, she could have easily used this money to fix stuff around her house or even trade in the little red car for something new (or newer). There are lots of things she could have spent this money on for herself.
There's the sense that Gram is still looking out for me, and her great-grandbaby even now. I think that's what chokes me up the most. I know that Gram would more than approve of this money going to Boo. Family meant so much to her, and making sure kids have what they need.
I'm fairly overwhelmed. This is just what I needed today.

Today we woke up to snow. Snow is good. Snow, unfortunately makes life and driving fun. This means that I still had my doctor's appointment, but Monday is my glucose test instead of today. (The appointment went well, by the way. Everything looks good, the heartbeat sound nice and strong. We won't know about a C-section or not for a while yet...) Because of my appointment this morning, I "worked" from home. Mostly I was home, and pretended to work. Much more comfortable than trying to be busy at work. It also means that Gak might be stuck at work for a double. That means he won't have to work tomorrow, but it means for a very, very long day for him today. (It also means I can't figure out what to do for dinner quite yet... if it's just me, I'll probably be lazy and finish off last night's pizza...)
Unfortunately, just like every other snow we've had this winter, it started out as snow (we probably got about 4-5 inches total) and then changed about mid-day to sleet/freezing rain. The streets don't look too bad right this minute, but that could change, especially once the sun goes down.

Well, I guess I'm going to wrap this up. I'm still in a little bit of shock (in a good way) about the nursery furniture.
Peace to all and may you have pleasant surprises and wonderful family in your lives.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

99 Days!!

Wow, I just looked over at my ticker, and if the doctor is right, and I'm due May 30th, Boo will be here in less than 100 days! (I personally still think it'll be closer to the 10th of June, but who really knows?) I suddenly feel like there's no time left at all.
We don't have a crib yet.
We haven't moved our bed to the other room.
We don't even have a car seat bought yet.
Other than some clothes, I really don't have anything purchased...
Our birthing classes start on the 5th.
I still have no clue about the job situation. (I fluctuate between not caring and being overly stressed about it...)
We haven't made an appointment to talk with the day care we both like (see above for part of the reason...)
I still don't think I look like I have that much of a pregnancy belly, but none of my old jeans fit. I guess it's because of the way my belly blubber looked before. It's now just mostly pushed up and a bit out... so I look bigger than I was, but not that nice, smooth pregnancy belly. Oh well.

Other than that, this week's been prety uneventful. Work's been work. I haven't gotten everything done I should have, but with the general attitude of my boss and the higher-ups... it's hard to care. I am impressed though, I am holding my regional training here the week after next and I think I've got more people coming to this one than the last two combined. Lets see... last year I had 4 or 5 total people. This time I've got 6! (I've got five full weeks, and two partials..) I haven't had this many since I went to Phoenix, December 2006! I just hope the rest of the year goes as smoothly. I'm trying not to think too hard about the June one... that's going to be a disaster, I just know it. Oh well. I'm just going to turn it over to my boss and let him handle it. It won't be my problem. I may have to clean up from it (or not... depending on my job...) but it won't be my problem to schedule, bill, order and teach. I wish him and whoever's actualy doing the teaching luck.

Well, I mostly just wanted to gasp about 99 days left. It's lunch time and I didn't pack anything. (There weren't quite enough leftovers from last night for lunch this morning and Gak finished off the other leftovers yesterday for lunch...)

Peace to all and may time be on your side.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008


I know... less than 12 hours since I last posted, but that's not the wow.
(Actually, 1st off I want to say happy birthday to Kat, who caught up to me again today... and appologize to Gak for such a lousy Valentines day... I didn't even get him a card... I'm so bad at the thoughtfull romantic stuf... *sigh*)

What I'm going WOW over is an email I got from ToysRUs. (Remember, Gak and I registered for all kinds of baby stuff for Boo at BabiesRUs, which is part of the same company.) It's this long email outlining their new product safety guidelines for all their supliers. All I have to say is, they're taking safety and some environmental concerns very seriously. Their max led content guideline is about 15% of the Federal standard (90ppm vs. 600ppm). And they're putting their own inspections into place all along the suply chain. Anyhow, follow the link above to see exactly why I'm going wow. That was a nice email to wake up to.

I'm still very cranky about the whole tax situation. The whole local thing is just one more reason for me to want to leave my current company. Gak's taxes this year were such a total mess, it was unbelievable. Out of his 3 W-2's, NONE of them had witheld the right amount of taxes. I just hope the tax "rebate" actualy gets here in a human ammount of time... I truly hate how low we've let the savings (hahaha) get over the past year. This was supposed to get us back up over that hurdle... stupid employers...

Ok, I'm going to go get ready for work now. Hopefully it'll be a better day.
Peace to all and may you get pleasent surprises in your email.

(yes, spellcheck still isn't working and I'm still too lazy to do anything about it...)

Monday, February 18, 2008


Well, I've been meaning to post for a few days. It just hasn't worked that way.
The trip wasn't too bad. The bad part was the fact that I went to pick up Gak at 2, and due to a scheduling snafu and misunderstanding, he wasn't getting off until about 4. Well, I managed to pick up the car and do some creative juggling and got on the road at about 4. The drive wasn't bad. the training went well and the trip back home wasn't bad either.
Friday night we hung out over at Kat's with her and Zoe. It was nice to just hang out. We didn't really do much other than watch some TV and eat leftovers. Leftovers are a good thing.
Saturday was another day when things just didn't go quite right. Gak was closing, yet again. He's closed every single saturday this year. We're both getting sick of it. The laundrymat was about as crowded and chaotic as I've ever seen it. I got the wash done, but not dry. I then went to the grocey store and wandered around for a while. I didn't have a list and had no idea how many nights Gak was closing or what to make for dinners anyhow. I did finally get the wash dry and some work on mom's afghan done, but it wasn't an overly productive day.
Sunday was a good day. It was a very productive day. Mom came up and we finally got the back room clean! I mean, the only thing on the floor is furniture. The other bedroom is also clean. (Well, except where I tossed my robe this morning when I got dressed...) All of the laundry is put away for the first time in months. I moved most of Gak's clothes into the dresser in the other room. It had to be done eventually, and it was either just do it and have him be cranky with me for doing it, or try and get him to do it before Boo's born and have it happen at the last minute (probably by me anyhow...) and just get me mad and cranky with him. This was the lesser of the evils. I even picked up new curtains for the room and got them shortened! I'm so impressed with how much we got done.
Today I had off. Mostly, I was just off. Gak had to work, but we knew that. I just wasn't right all day... not quite cranky, but not my normal self either. I fiddled around a bit with the DS, tried to read a bit and tried to play the game for a bit too. I did manage to get a good bit of crocheting done and made some brownies. They turned out well.
Tonight we had an appointment to get our taxes done. (We'd originally tried to Friday, but there wasn't any room for walk-ins...) This is what is really making me grumpy. Normally, we owe a little bit to state and local, but get a sizeable refund back from the Feds. Not this year. This year, we owe everyone. Actually, we owe the state less than $1, so they said to keep it. (My, aren't they generous!) Thanks to my wonderful company, who've only been taking out 0.5%, and Gak's employers not witholding anything, we owe over $400 to local and $25 to the Feds. Not exactly the news I wanted tonight. I mean, I purposfully pay an extra $5 a week on my Federal witholding just to make sure I'll get something back at the end of the year. It annoys me to no end that my company has messed up local again. Aparently, they've messed up everyone's. I'm even more cranky with Gak's employer, they've really made life tough. Oh well. We'll live. It looks like we'll be paying taxes this month instead of picking up the crib we liked at Target. Luckilly we've got a little more time to get the crib than we do to pay the taxes. Hopefully I'll be able to get something done about my local taxes tomorrow. I doubt it, but I can try.
Oh well. I'm off to get a brownie and a glass of milk. Maybe tomorrow will be better... even though I have to go to work. (I've got a bunch of crap to get done by Wednesday that snuck up on me... oh well. It'll keep me out of trouble I hope.) Friday is my glucose tolerance test. Hopefuly that'll go well. I'm not really worried about it, but one never knows.
Peace to all and may you not have any grumpy days.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Travel Time!

Well, I'm about to hit the road again. Only overnight, and I'm driving, but this is my first trip since early December! Amazing. I think it has been three years since I've been home that many days in a row. I was really enjoying that. Oh well.
My travel days are coming to an end though. At least for a while. I'm sure there will be many, many family travel adventures in my future. I hope some of them are as fun and exciting as some of the trips I took as a kid with my family. We went to some really neat places. I'd still love to get back to New Mexico. Those mountains were beautiful!
Of course, now that my travel is winding down, but who would call asking for training other than Pasadena. I'd actualy like to go there. That's where Becca is living, that's where I've often met up with Jon and Beverly and Richard for dinner. Pasadena is a nice place and has some cool things to do. Oh well. I guess some other lucky soul will get to go. I hope they enjoy it. It's not even a deffinate, they were just calling for details. Knowing how these things go, it's about a 30-40% chance that they'll actually book something. I think I've had more oppertunities fall off the radar than get scheduled. For example, there was at least one or two that were interested in last month that never replied and at least three or four for this month. Instead, I've got one trip and one in-house seminar, neither of which are bringing in any "new" money. If whoever ends up doing this in the future could get that other 60% or so to commit and actualy buy things, we'd be swamped. That wouldn't be a bad thing.
Anyhow, enough about that. Hopefully this trip will go smoothly and the drive will be easy. I hope to be home almost early tomorrow. I have to be onsite by about 7 am tomorrow, which means I should be wrapped up by 3 at the latest and hopefully home sometime between 6 and 7. It'll be a long day, but not as long as if I left tomorrow morning. I'm not sure I'd make it. That 7 am onsite is looking waaaay too early, since the site is about 10 miles from the hotel. Ugh. Oh well. It could be worse, much worse.
Well, I've got to go. I've got to pick up Gak from work so we can go pick up the rental car.
Peace to all and may you have the occasional adventure.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

This and That

This weekend went fairly well. Saturday I managed to get quite a bit done, but not as much as I'd hoped. Sunday, Mom was supposed to come up, but didn't because she did something to her back again. It happens from time to time and a bit of rest and a lot of time with the heating pad usualy fixes it. I did get a good chunk of the yarn organized at any rate. Not all of it is put away, but it's a bit more organized and I *gasp* got rid of some. Most of what I got rid of was stuff I'd inherited from various sources that felt funky and smelled very musty. I know, since most of if was acrylic, it could have been washed, but it just wasn't worth the effort. I also got rid of some funky stuff I had picked up on clearence and fiugred out why it was so cheep when I tried to work with it. Oh well. Live and learn.
Yesterday was almost a good day at work. It sounds like my boss and his boss are moving ever closer to figuring out what to do about training. We also called about my leave and, yes, I do only get 6 weeks, 8 if I end up having to have a C. So, I'll end up out for 9 to 11 weeks with using up my vacation time. I'll have to live with that. I won't like it when the time comes to return, but I'll deal.
I did have a hard time not yelling at a customer yesterday though. Remember a few weeks back I said something about being in on a conference call and no idea why. Well, this is the continuing saga of that customer. I've figured out that the only reason I'm there is because I was bored enough not to get out of it and that since I was in service for so long, I still have a clue on how to fix some of this. About half of these issues should have been turned over to service long ago, and projects left out of it. I didn't need to be involved past the first call because they weren't complaining about the job I'd done and weren't interested in adding more training. (Which is good, I really don't feel like going to that part of California again soon... it's too far north to be able to get to visit any of my family.)
Well, I was trying not to yell at them because they were being pig-headed and stupid. They weren't listening to what the developer had to say and they still didn't understand what I'd been telling them in about 6 different ways in the last 3 or 4 weeks. Luckilly, the little mental overide switch was working quite well. You should have heard the internal monolouge though. It was quite colorful and interesting. I still say it's a good thing we don't have video phones yet. I may be able to control what I say, but I have absolutly no control over my body language. If I don't like you or think you're being stupid, I have a very hard time not showing it when I'm talking to you face to face. Oh well. Most people get over it, and those that don't, I hopefuly don't need to deal with much anyhow.
I know there was another reason I started this post, but I lost is a few paragraphs back. Maybe it was to say that there does appear to be a light at the end of the tunnel with the job issue, and it doesn't appear to be a train right now. I realy have no idea. Thanks Boo for giving me a swift kick to the belly button and making me forget all about what I was going to say.
Oh well. I guess I'd best get back to my "work". Oh, totally random thought; it's snowing. Unfortunately, it's supposed to change over to freezing rain/sleet before it's done and that's a mess. I'd love to have just one snowstorm this winter that didn't turn to ice. I mean, we don't live in Oklahoma or Texas. They're the ones that get the ice storms. We're supposed to get the pretty snow that you at least have some hope of traction on.
Ok. I really must be going now. I've got yet another stupid meeting in about 10 minutes.
Peace to all and may things go your way from time to time.

Friday, February 08, 2008

Things NOT To Say To Coworkers...

I'm writing this because if I don't, I'm going to explode, and it won't be pretty, for me or my coworkers.
I'm still not in a great mood and frustrated as all hell about work (I didn't sleep well because I was cranky). So, it doesn't help that the two guys who sit to my right (as I'm sitting at my desk) are two of the most negative people on the planet. Or at least those who like to complain the most. Here is a list of things I'd love to say to them, but won't, because it's not nice and wouldn't solve anything anyway, it'll just give them something else to bitch about:
*Stop complaining about the @#%$ spam email we get from corporate. We work for a huge company and no matter where you go with any large company, you'll get crap you don't want. Just delete it and shut up.
*Complaining loudly to your coworkes that the "new" timesheet system stinks, is broken, takes forever and is "stupid" won't solve anything. It'll just piss us off and make us want to duct tape your mouth shut so you'll stop complaining.
*We're all overworked and under paid. Shut up and deal or get another job.
*No, you don't know everything about everything.
*At least you know what your job will be in 6 months... I haven't a freaking clue!
*Not everyone here cares about your every single need and want. You're an adult not the center of the universe! Grow up and deal!
*I didn't ask you for your political/religious views, so stop trying to shove them down my throat!
*I just don't like you very much, now go away.

Ok. That's a bit better, I'm not going to explode now, but that just goes to show you how poisonous it can be around here. It's hard to maintain a good outlook on life and work when you're surrounded by people who only ever complain about every little blessed thing. This sure as anything isn't helping me remain stress free, calm and figure out what in the world is going on with my whole job situation...
I just want to go home and take a nap...

I'm just so glad it is Friday. And Mom is coming up on Sunday. And Gak probably has off on Sunday. And it's a pay day! Maybe we'll splurge for the week and go out for dinner tonight. Maybe I'll even let myself have a coke. I haven't had one in a week or two now. (I haven't totally removed soda from my diet, but have severly cut down. Hopefully I'll be able to continue that trend after Boo is born, I know I don't need all those empty calories!)

Peace to all and may you not explode at your coworkers, even if they deserve it and may your path be clear of too many unknown obsticles.

(p.s. I'm still not getting spellcheck to work, and am too lazy to copy and paste into word and back, so you get to see how poorly I spell...)

Thursday, February 07, 2008

Heartache and Headaches

Today is one of those days where I just miss Gram so horribly.
Earlier in the week Gak's mom sent out a thing about "grandmothers are..." and I could barely get through it.
Today I need my Gram. I could always call her and talk about what was bothering me and she'd just listen, or give a few good suggestions on what to do. It's not that I can't talk with Gak, I do frequently. He just doesn't have the same perspective, in some cases he's too close to the scene... It's not that I can't talk with Mom, it's just different. Gram was always able to see to the heart of what was bothering me and help me see it too. She was there to support me and just give me love.
So, why today do I need the advice and love of Gram? Well, I had too much time on my hands this afternoon at work. This got me to thinking about how uncertian my work situation really is right this moment and how hard this is making it when it comes to planning my maternity leave and beyond. I don't know what is beyond. What job will I be coming back to? Will I still be doing training in any way, shape or form? Will I even be returning to this company? Do I want to? This isn't a very healthy train of thought on a good day, let alone a day when you've got customers asking some of the same, or simmilar, questions. My boss, with all his good intentions, is pretty much useless right now. HR is a joke and a half. My former boss, I don't even want to deal with. I need the distance of age and perspective of having been there that Gram had. Mom wasn't working outside the house when Jon or I were born, it wasn't a financial necesity. (She was taking classes before I was born and had been working prior... but other than a few things didn't really have an outside job until we were in high school and they opened their business.) Therefore, Mom, as much love as she has for me, hasn't had to face this directly herself. I don't think Gram was working when Mom was born, but she did become a single parent when Mom was pretty young. I'm not a single mom, and have no plans of every having to be... but in some ways it's simmilar. She had to balance earning enough money and daycare. Gak and I have to do the same. She also had to deal with having a job in a "man's world". She was a technician, not in a "traditionally" woman's job like a hairdresser or nurse or secratary. She had to prove herself every day, as do I.
Mostly she'd listen. She'd probably tell me, gently, to get off my butt and dust off that resume. To go ahead and start looking, even if I decide not to leave and everything pans out where I'm at. She'd tell me to keep on top of my boss and demand answers. But mostly she'd end the conversation with an "I love you" and an "I'm so proud of you". That meant more than anything from her. It made everything OK.
Well, I guess I should probably wrap this up and go pull out the yarn. I'm working on a few projects. Although, I'm not sure that'll help tonight. She's the one who taught me that too... and I've been using her hooks.
Peace to all and may you have someone in your life who is always there for you with the right answer at the right time.
(p.s. sorry for any mispellings... spell check isn't working for me with Blogger...)

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Total Randomness

This is just totally random. I've got several things bumping around in my head.
First off, I want to say a HUGE Thank You!!! to Gak's boss and wife. Monday Gak brought home a grocery bag stuffed with 0-6 month (mostly 3-6 month) clothes. Some of it will be a little heavy for a spring/summer baby, but that's OK. There were about a dozen onsies, including some very cute firetruck themed ones. There were also about as many one-piece sleepers in varying weights, mostly lightweight. There were a few other pieces in there as well. All cute! I still could use some "plain" solid or just stripped onsies. I could also use some "short sets" or at least "shorts" to go with the onsies. I probably could also use some "sun hats" as it will be summer. I don't need to worry too much about warmth, but definately sunburn if Boo has skin anything remotely like his father's. (I think Gak turns red at the mere thought of spending the day outside in the summer...)
I also was just poking around on this "expectant mother's" board. I registered at back when I found out I was expecting Boo. They send me weekly emails about what's going on and the site has tons and tons of information. One thing they do is host "due date clubs", which are message boards for women expecting in the same calendar month. Like I said, I was just poking around on there. I've looked a few other times as well. I realize that I have almost no connection to these other women. I'm sure some of them are as old as I am. (No, I'm not old to become a momma, but I'm not 23 either...) I know a lot of them work. For many on the board, this isn't their first child. Maybe it's just me. I mean, yes, I have fears and worries, but they're mostly about me being able to be patient, and understanding and a good momma. I mean, I have very few worries about the pregnancy itself, especially now that we've had our second ultrasound and I feel Boo squirming and kicking quite a bit these days. I truly guess my biggest fear or worry about the pregnancy is delivery. The looming question of if I'll have to have a C or not... and if I really want, or will be able to go through, "natural" childbirth. (Drugs are your friend... there's no reason to have that much pain...) I guess I'm too laid-back about everything. Sometimes it's good, but sometimes it's not to have this "we'll cross that bridge when we get there" attitude. I mean, I can't change anything, this is one of those things totally out of my control, or at least almost. I just don't get it. Women have been having babies for mellenia and for most of the time with much, much less information and medical attention than we get these days. I just don't get it....
(OK, so I lied... maybe I do wonder why I feel no connection to these other people... I'm hoping it's just my total independant streak and refusal to "follow the crowd"...)
Anyhow, enough rambling about that.

Work's been OK this week. There's been this huge meeting going on downstairs for the last three days. I'm not sure how usefull it'll all be, but hey, that's corporate life for you. We had the "quarterly business update" today as well. Vaugley interesting. Still, it was mostly just hot air and didn't really have any substance.
Monday we had something interesting happen to the Internet. It's a good thing I didn't have to get anything done within our own network for the last hour or so of the day. I was trying to get to a few internal links, and this is the kind of screen I kept getting. (Yes, I blanked out the company name as best I could. I mean, everything I complain about could happen at any large company and you really don't need to know who I work for unless you actually already know me...)
**Blogger isn't uploading pictures again for me... I may try and post it later. It's probably the fact that I'm at work.***
Doesn't it just crak you up that the reson the site was blocked was because it was "business"? It certinally had me laughing. Luckilly, it was resolved shortly and I was able to check my travel plans for next week and take the employee oppinion survey. I'm sure they really didn't want my oppinion this year, but they asked, so they got it. They actually left it open a few days longer because people weren't responding. That should tell them something right there, now shouldn't it. I mean, it's almost like people were saying "Why bother? Nothing will change anyohow...".
I still have no answers about my job situation. I try not to worry about it most of the time, but it still sits there and nags me in the back of my mind. I mean, I then get emails saying "I'd love to come to your seminar, but just can't make the March one, do you have any others this year?" What in the world am I supposed to say to that one? Do I commit to September and December and hope that someone will do them? Are we even going to have a "training department" as such after March or May? What do I do about the new projects that are going out and want to get on the schedule? I don't have answers for them and I hate that. I mean, I can deal with not having answers right when I'm asked, but even when I try and find out the answers, there aren't any. No one is being any help at all. I'm so fed up and frustrated by it, because I want to be able to do my job and do it well. I hate how this makes me look like a total incompetant. There are enough people like that in the world, and I'm not one of them.

Another rapid subject change for ya... I finally got Addey up to 78 last night. Gak and I were just hanging out, doing a few quests when Trak, one of the guildies asks if we want company. Of course! Well, after a bit we end up going through the same dungeon as we did Saturday. It went much more smoothly, even if in some ways it was tougher because of the types of people we had along. We only wiped out once. Both Gak and I got some neat things from there and had an enjoyable evening over all. It's evenings like this that I'd been missing with Wings. I mean, hanging out with Charitee, Chris and Syn were fun, but we didn't have enough people to do anything. At least nothing big and tough with good rewards. I'm really enjoying Despair. They may be huge, but the people I've gotten to know there are all friendly and fun and extreemly helpful when you need them.

Well, I've been poking and prodding at this entry long enough. It's time for me to get back to the emails and pretend to get some "real" work done. Bah. Oh well. At least tomorrow's Thursday and Friday is a pay day!
Peace to all and may you have friends and answers.

Sunday, February 03, 2008

Baby Crafts

Warning.... crafty Momma ramble ahead...
Well, Like I said yesterday, I finished up Boo's blankie. Last night and this morning, in a vain attempt to use up the rest of the leftover yarn, I created a vest and diaper cover. I still have an almost full skein of yellow and about a half skein of green! I'm sure some project will use them up... I hope....

I acutaly spent from about 8am until almost noon working on finishing up the last little bit of the vest (edging... yet again...) and creating the diaper cover. I found both patterns for free online. I'm not as happy with the vest. It's pretty cute and all, but it's just not my favorite. The pattern wasn't very clear in a few places, luckilly I know what a vest should look like and how to count. The one really nice thing about it is that you only had to stitch the shoulder seams, no side seams to try and line up. But let me tell you, changing colors every two rows stinks when you have to weave in ends. Normally I just work over them, but the open-ness of this pattern didn't make that look so hot. Oh well. I'm just hoping the crotch part of the diaper cover is long enough. We'll find out in a handfull of months now, won't we? I'm also thinking it may be a little wide, but that's easy to fix with a small piece of elastic threaded thorugh the waist. Now I really can't wait for Boo to get here, I need to see if what I made fits him!
Ok, enough crafty baby-ness for one post. I swear, I really do have thoughts other than about yarn and Boo... or Boo and yarn... or just Boo... or just yarn...
For example, Gak and I had a great time running through a pretty cool dungeon in EQII yesterday morning. We went with a handful of guildies. (Oh, yeah, I forgot to tell you, I pulled Addey from Wings of Fate and joined up with Despair... great group!) We also had a necro from another guild who was pathetic. And they accidentally bid on, and won, a no-trade item that Gak really, really, really could have used. Oh well. They appologized at any rate. Still a bit cranky about it, but that just means we don't need to group with them again. Anyhow, it was very nice to just be able to go out and have an adventure with a group for a bit.
Well, I've got to go start supper. Gak should be home from work in a bit. Peace to all, and may you have fun adventures and things that make you smile.

Saturday, February 02, 2008

Groundhogs and Grandmothers

I know, I know, it's an odd title.
Not if you knew my Gram.
Today would have been her 85th birthday. My Gram, the groundhog. She always claimed to be born in a raging snowstorm, and she's probably right. It was a good snowstorm we had the day of her memorial.
This time 6 or 8 months ago, Mom and I were trying to figure out what we should do for Gram's 85th. We had a small suspicion that she wouldn't be doing well, but it wasn't until a few months later that we were pretty sure she wouldn't see this day. I wish she had, in some ways. It would have been nice to throw her one last party. She really was a very social and sociable person. She was always the center of everything, and it was fun to watch her.
I meant to call my Mom today, but I didn't. I feel pretty bad about that. I'm sure today was a bit more wierd for her than for me and my brother. Both of us would have called her, of course, but well... Gram was Mom's mom... a different story all together. Hopefully the shop was full of lots and lots of people.

The groundhog, who happens to live a couple of hours west of here, says 6 more weeks of winter. I'd like to know when we've had winter start? I mean, sure, we've had a few bitterly cold weeks, and a bit of snow early on. Back in December it looked like this was going to be a bad winter. I'm still waiting for something other than sleet and rain. Mind you, rain is much easier to drive in, but not as pretty and in some ways even more miserable.

Hopefully tomorrow I'll have some pictures for you. I finished up Boo's blanket and sent it through the wash this morning. I guess I should say the first blanket I'm making. Knowing me, I'll probalby make at least one or two more. Gak gave me a bunch of pattern books for Christmas. I told him to pick one out. He hasn't yet. Maybe he will, maybe he won't. We'll see.

Anyhow, just wanted to make a quick post and wish my Gram a happy 85th, even though she isn't here with us any more.
Peace to all and may your lives be full of wonderful people.