Confusing

The last day has had a couple of odd realizations.  And I don't think they're connected really, other than the fact that I made them and all within about 24 hours.  I'm now not even sure which one happened first, so the order will be by random number generator (i.e. however my brain spits the words out through my fingers...).

Realization A:  I have no idea how my parents slept when I was little.  Or even when I was not so little and would come down with one of those horrible hacking, wheezing nasty coughs that made me afraid to go to sleep.  (Honestly, there were a couple of colds I remember having where I couldn't breathe much at all and was afraid to go to sleep because I might not wake up and drown in my own goo... not a pleasant thought at all...)

I came to this realization last night while listening to Boo hack and cough and sputter off and on throughout the night.  I kept fighting between getting up and checking on him after every bad cough and trying to get back to sleep because "he's fine...."  This, of course, is coming from the girl who's parents knew exactly when she woke up because there would be a bout of loud, hacking, barking coughing followed by a loud, obnoxious nose blowing.  How mom managed not to run to my bedside every time I coughed funny in my sleep, I'll never know.  Or maybe I'll figure it out in a few years time when this whole being a momma thing isn't quite so new.  (Boo is sleeping much more quietly so far this evening.  We'll see what 2am brings though...)

Realization B: I do have the energy to continue to play EQII and my friends there actually do miss me.  This really came in two phases.  The first was yesterday noon-time when Gak had logged in using my account to see if anyone we knew was around to say hi.  (He let his account go dormant back when Warhammer came out...)  Well, our three closest friends were indeed on.  I got to catch up with them for a few and realized how much I really did miss playing around in that world and talking to these people.  I most especially miss talking with Syn.  He may be a dirty old man at times, but he's harmless and very nice and a good friend.  I miss Charitee and Chris as well, but differently.  

The realization that I will actually continue to play came tonight.  Boo went to bed, or at least wanted to lay in his dark room in his crib, fairly early.  This means I was able to keep my promise to myself to log back in today or tomorrow.  Sure enough, Syn was on.  Actually, he was the only one of my friends who was on.  I took out my little level 46 monk and he brought out his 47 fury, and we kicked minotaur butt for a while.  It was good.  It was nice to just hang out.  I needed it.

I'd been avoiding logging in for a couple of months now.  It seemed like a chore.  I think that's because I just don't want to face Despair with Addey.  I really don't have anything for her to do by herself.  I don't really know anyone in that guild any more.  Syn doesn't usually play his "big kids" much these days, so she doesn't have anyone to hang out with.  That and I was sure that no one would really want to talk to me, that they'd all moved on.  Well, that's not true.  Syn, Charitee and Chris all miss having me around.  I think I'm going to make it a point to be around more.  Probably not every night.  Maybe only 2 or 3 a week, but still... a couple of hours a week hanging out with people will do me a world of good.  My world had shrunk to work, boy, sleep repeat.  As much as I love my boy and as much as I need sleep and have to go to work, I need to be social a bit too.

Anyhow, I think I've rambled on a bit on that for now.  I'm getting tired (it's now past my bed time) and should really be asleep now.  Oh, the picture at the top of the post is from last night.  Boo was having a good, calm, time in his bath and I just couldn't help but get some pictures.  (For more, check out the Flickr as always!)

Peace to all and may your brain not confuse you too much.