Gender Specific Toys?

‘Tis the season to be shopping....

Yes, yes, I know, that wasn’t a very good try.  Anyhow, being bombarded with all the consumerism of the season and having recently completed the small amount of shopping we wanted to do for our son, I’ve had this thought bouncing around in my head.  Something I’m sure I’ve touched on before, even if only in passing with friends.

That dreaded topic of “gender specific” toys.

What initially got me thinking about this is the strange dichotomy that seems to exist when it comes to the kitchen.  You see all these great kitchen play sets done up in pinks and purples and all pretty and flowery to appeal to the young girl. *rolls eyes* But, when I watch things like “Top Chef” or talk to Abi about her time at Johnson & Whales, the predominant attitude is that you have to be a man to be a good chef, a top chef in the industry.  Why is it OK for a girl to play house and spend all her time in the kitchen cooking, but not for a little boy?  Why can’t a girl excel at the highly skilled and demanding job of being an executive chef?*   Or at least that’s what the advertising people seem to want us to think.

So, why is it that 99% of the kitchen toys out there are geared towards little girls?  I admit, I’ve seen a few pictures for kitchen play sets that show a little boy (all dressed in a sweater vest and tie! /another eye roll/ )  My son loves playing in the kitchen.  He frequently asks to help me cook.  I even let him some times, depending on what we’re making.  (He likes to help unless it’s going to be messy… and I don’t quite like him to help with the hot things yet, he has a habit of putting his hands out and leaning on whatever is in front of him, not a good idea with the stove!)  So, yes, this year we got him a little box of toy kitchen implements.**  He has his on drawer in the kitchen, which currently only has some plastic lids in it and the microwave bacon tray.  These will be his to play with in the kitchen.  He will love them.  And you know what; I really could care less that they’re all pink and purple.  I just wish I could have found a set that look more like my real tools without costing as much as my real tools.

And then, while looking through an article from the New York Times book section about the top kids’ books of the year, I come across this statement “This lullaby in rhyming couplets will also be loved by girls, with its images of vehicles clasping stars and cradling teddy bears.”

And my response immediately was “why wouldn’t a girl like a story about construction trucks?”  Why would you think that just because it has trucks in it and is “dirty” that a girl wouldn’t be interested at all?  I mean, Zoe has her own toolbox full of real tools and loves to help.  Kat is the first person I ask about what’s wrong with the car and then go to Andy if she’s stumped.  I can wield a hammer, pliers a saw or a drill as well or better than my husband.  (Don’t worry; he freely admits he’s not a tool kind of person…)  Mom and I spent many hours fixing things around the house when I was growing up, and building things for Gram.

Personally, assigning a gender to who should play with which toy is absurd.  Just like assigning colors to genders seems a little silly.  Sure, I don’t always practice what I preach and I will sometimes try and steer my son away from the bright pink shirt or backpack.  But then I remember that my brother’s favorite color for a few years there was pink, just because it was mine.  And if Boo ever really put up a fight for having to have the pink one, even after seeing his other options, I’d get it for him, because it would make him happy.  (Trust me, my son is definitely a “boy” and it has nothing to do with the colors he wears but in the way he thinks and approaches the world.)

But in this world with enough mixed messages, shouldn’t we be giving our kids the toys they want to play with, not just the ones we think they should play with?  Boo has loved playing in the kitchen and “cooking” since he was big enough to crawl.  He also loves tape measures and anything with buttons and cars and trucks and trains.  He loves his stuffed animals and takes care of them, including when they’re sick. (Kelly seems to always have a cold these days, poor girl.)  He even corrected me when I said that Kelly was a boy, Kelly is most definitely a girl bear.  When you ask him who his friends are he’s just as likely to say “Alexis” as “Dominic” or “Joey”.  (Actually, usually you just get “I don’t like Kevin” and then only after assuring him that’s OK, will he give you his friends’ names.)

Have I come to any conclusions other than the fact that I think that advertising people are playing it “safe” and continuing cultural norms that have been in place since the dark ages?  Not really.  I continue to be happy with our decision to buy Boo both a set of kitchen toys and a tool box and a tape measure for Christmas.  He will love all three toys very much.  The tools for both kitchen and workshop will allow him to continue to be creative and explore all kinds of things in his imagination.  And that, above all else, is the important thing; encouraging our kiddos imaginations.  Letting them figure out solutions to problems and who they want to be.

Peace to all and may you have plenty of toys that make you happy, no matter who is “supposed” to play with them.

*There have been some awesome women on some of the Top Chef seasons, but most of the women on the show just don’t have the edge or talent or skill that the men do.  Maybe they just aren’t as competitive, but I know that women can be extremely competitive when they want to, just spend a day in a high school…

**If anyone is looking for ideas for a boy-child, some play food would not go amis…

*** No, that's not the play set I bought Boo, I can't find it online.

Katchup Eddition

Oops. Looks like I fell off the planet again. It was an action filled couple of days.

All in a good way, don't worry. No ER trips or sick kiddos or anything like that. Nope, just good old busy.

Friday was our company picnic. We all had our doubts about the weather, but Dave said he ordered sunshine for noon, and sure enough, right about noon the sun came out and decided to stay out. I think it was just about the best day we've had in about a week or so! Anyhow, the picture at the top is from the picnic.

Family wasn't invited this year and it wasn't catered. I wish families had been invited, it is so much more fun that way (that and it gives me an excuse to go pick up my boy and spend the entire afternoon together). I like that we did it ourselves this year. Everyone brings so much food even if they don't sign up and there is such a variety it's all good. (That and I'm sure it cost us a good bit less... although we've been self-funding our activities committee with a semi-weekly 50/50 drawing... which is fun in and of itself...) I ended up being drafted as photographer since I was the only one who had a working camera. The activities committee person who was doing it had her camera die about half an hour in. Not dead batteries die, refuse to work die. That's sad.

Anyhow, Saturday we went on a Quest. It was mostly a fruitless Quest, but it was a Quest none the less. You see, we're in search of just a cabinet door. Why, do you ask. Well, it's because little fingers find Dadda's computer way too interesting. The desks we have are great with a nice open shelf area for the computer. It is also just the right size to close off the front (without affecting the computer's access to air in general) with a door. This door can then be latched when little fingers are awake and active. But, unfortunately, most places sell whole cabinets, not just replacement doors. We were given a web site to check out (which I almost remember, but I'm sure a quick Google search will set right...) and that was about it. I'm also going to check with a friend that just might have one lurking about with all the odds and ends that he's got.

Anyhow, after that fruitless search, we ended up heading south to Babies R Us (on another fruitless Quest... for new sandals for Boo... he ditched one on the ride to day care the other day....) We did pick up diapers and a few other needed things. We also did some phone shopping. Our phones can be replaced next month and as neither Gak nor I are very happy with the quality of the ones we have... we're looking. We're sticking with AT&T since all the plans I looked at cost about the same and if we switch carriers we've got to wait until January. And no, we can't afford iPhones and the data plan to go with them. (If anyone out there is using AT&T without a data plan and has suggestions for phones... let me know!)

We did have a successful trip to Toys R Us though. We got Boo a new boat (er... ship if you ask Gak... even though it's just a small fishing boat...) He also got a new wooden race car that was on sale and a DVD that has 4 or 5 Eric Carle stories on it, including The Very Hungry Caterpillar. It's cute. All of this was thanks to Aunt Andy's birthday money for the boy. He's still got a little more to spend, but I may just tuck it into his savings. And yes, the boat is just as interesting now that we've got it home and he's taken it into the tub. I'll try and get pictures next bath time.

Yesterday was mostly low-key. We went to lunch at Red Robbin (we've got to stop doing that... financially and calorie-wise....) We then went to Target and finally found sandals for the boy. (I hadn't found any there earlier in the week and ended up getting him a pair of sneakers to keep at school....) We also found a few other odds and ends. We tried the new grocery store that just opened up there, Aldi. It's a little hit or miss. The prices are all dirt cheep, but the quality in many cases matches. I mean, I could get a gallon of ice cream for under $2, but if you read the ingredients list, no thanks! I'll stick to Bryers, I can pronounce all of their ingredients.

Anyhow, I'm now just about running late for work. I have a love/hate relationship with this 7am start. I'd best get dressed and out the door.

Peace to you all and may you have good adventures.

We di

Shoes! (And Other Things)

My boy now has his first pair of Chucks.  Yes, they make Converse Chuck Taylors in infant sizes.  I love them.  They're super cute, super soft and look like they should hold up well.  (I do need to get longer laces so I can double-knot them.  This picture was taken off the Zappos.com web site.)

No, he can't wear them quite yet.  I could only find them in a size 3 at BabiesRUs yesterday.  I did, however, find a very cute pair of brown "sneakers" in size 2 that do fit.  Unfortunately, I didn't have my camera with me when we went to pick up Gak from work and I first put them on him and by the time we got home, he was too tired and cranky for good picture taking.  I hope to get pictures soon.  (Although, he was super cute in his outfit yesterday, his brown pants, matching raccoon T-shirt and the brown sneaks... He really is too adorable for words.)

I'd been thinking for a couple of weeks that Boo needs some kind of shoe, or at least something more than just socks.  We're heading into cold weather and well, socks just won't cut it.  He also doesn't get any traction at all with just his socks when he's in his bouncer or I try and "stand" him on the counter or table or whatever.  I did not want anything hard or stiff.  I would have liked something with Velcro.  Actually, I was looking at these from Zapos or these from Target.

Let me tell you, shoe shopping for an infant is even harder than for me!  I had ducked into WalMart last week *shudder* because it's right near work and I needed tissues and cough drops.  I checked and they had almost nothing as far as shoes and booties went, and well, I didn't like what they did have.  I looked at my Target last weekend when I was there to pick up some other things, and they had shoes similar to the ones I linked, but all in pinks and purples, or some sneakers similar to the ones I bought (not the Chucks), but only had them in size 3 or 4, which I knew was going to be too big.  Yesterday at lunch I went and ran quickly down to BabiesRUs.  Their shoe selection in the spring and summer had been great.  It was neat and well kept.  Yesterday, that was a different story.  It was very messy and hard to find anything.  They had some really cute ones in size zero that I would have loved, but Boo outgrew that size months ago.  I eventually found the two pair I got.  I figured if the 2's were too small, they could go back, but I'd hold on to the Chucks even if they were too big, because he'll grow into them.

Now, the trick will be getting Gak to put them on him.  Of course, the second trick will be keeping Boo from untieing them and then taking them off.  He got one untied yesterday, but didn't know what to do from there.  He really didn't seem to mind them.  That's good.  If he's anything like me, he'll refuse to wear them when he gets bigger.  Most of the time you'll either find me in bare feet, lightweight sandals or hiking boots.  Well, sneakers these days, but I'd rather have my boots.  Yes, that's opposite ends of the spectrum, either nothing or something heavy.  It's me, what do you expect?

Anyhow, the world continues to turn even as I was on my quest for baby shoes.  I can't begin to say how many shades of ticked I am about Prop 8 passing in California.  Not just because my cousin and her wife now have no idea where things stand for them legally.  (They'd had a domestic partnership but aren't sure if that got nullified with their marriage back in August or what happens now.)  I mean, what if something happens to Rae, what are Kami's legal rights as her partner?  It's so not fair that other people get to decide if Rae and Kami are allowed to marry.  It makes me livid.  Who am I to say if you love someone enough to be their life-long partner?  I've found mine.  They've found each other.  I've seen few loves as true as theirs.

Ok, I'm going to step off my soap box before I just totally tick myself off for the day.

We shall see how the world turns over the next several years.  These are exciting times we live in.  So many possibilities, so many chances for things to go wonderfully right or horribly wrong.  I just hope we're somewhere in the middle on that.  I'll take some downs if there are some ups to go with them.

When I think back over the first 5 months of my son's life, it's been an amazing world.  The Olympics were held in China, the Phillies won the World Series, we elected a black man to be President of the United States.... what other earth changing things will happen in his life time?  It's a scary thing to think about.

Anyhow, it's just about 6:30 and I need to hop in the shower and get dressed.  Here's to Fridays and weekends!

Peace to all and may you have shoes that fit and lives that are interesting.

Good Weekend

Well, so far it's been a good weekend.
Friday night Gak and I went over to Kat's. Scott, Chris and Dianne were there as well. Steve even showed up for a bit. We had Pizza, played Apples to Apples and had a generally good time. Well, Scott's brain nearly exploded. I'm good at doing that to him though. I'm not exactly the most predictable person on the planet. I think towards the end I was doing things just to see the gears spin and break in his brain. It was quite fun overall.
We also got lots of mail on Friday. Gak got a bunch of Orks he'd ordered and they look great. We got a nifty package of stuff Michelle had picked up for us from Puerto Rico when she was there in the fall and I got 6 new shirts! Six! And all but one fits really well... one I'm still thinking about. And for just under $70! They were ordered from http://www.womanwithin.com. They were cheap, but decent quality and look great. They weren't even maternity shirts, but regular ones that I'll be able to shorten a bit after Boo is born.
Yesterday I didn't do diddly squat. I didn't sleep well, and I was just out of sorts. That's OK because I have a three day weekend. I slept a bit, fiddled around with yarn a bit and was just mostly out of sorts. Gak had to close so that meant I had the whole afternoon and evening to myself. I enjoyed it in a grumpy kind of way.
Today was a productive day. Gak and I finally went down to BabiesRUs to register for stuff. If anyone cares, you can find it on the web here. There's lots of stuff on there. I'll probably be making some adjustments and additions over the next week or so, when I get a chance to really look it over again and add some stuff that's available on the web only. I think Gak was having a bit more fun than I was with some of it. He really, truly is excited about all of this. In a quiet way, which is his way. He was quietly excited and terrified about the wedding. He's the same way now. We're both really excited about this journey. I just hope we can get through with as few big mistakes as possible. (I know we'll make lots, all parents do... just hopefully nothing huge.)
Tomorrow I have off. Mom is coming up in the afternoon and we're going to alter a few of my new shirts and tackle the dining room. Hopefully I'll be able to get pictures of the setup dining room by the end of tomorrow. We'll see. I may be able to convince her to give me a hand with some of the stuff in the back bedroom or hall closet as well... I need a swift kick in the butt to actually deal with it, not just complain and worry about it.
Well, I'm off to go fix supper. Gak's beginning to gnaw on his arm, so I guess I'd better feed him.
Peace to all and may you have a good weekend.

Pants!

Well, today was a success. I had a good time just hanging out with mom today. We don't get to do that nearly often enough. I think the last time we had any time just the two of us was when we were in California back in August. That seems like a life time ago now.
The first thing we did was have a good laugh at the pants Michelle and I got last week. She pinned them for shortening, which will be a great help. (It's a royal pain to try and shorten your own pants because you have to keep pinning and trying on until you get it right.)
Then we went adventuring to the mall. Our first stop was Ruby's for lunch. Actually, I had lunch, Mom just stole some of my fries and had a vanilla malted. She'd had a fairly late and large breakfast.
We had some interesting adventures in clothes shopping. The first store we went into was a very high-end maternity store. Like, they had $200.00 cashmere sweaters. Or $150 dresses. I don't pay that much for clothes I wear every day for years, let alone something I'll wear a season or so and then never wear again. I guess some people do though, it was semi-crowded. We tried a couple of the higher end department stores as well. That was also funny. We finally ventured back into more sanely priced places. There were a couple of really cute shirts at JC Penny's in the plus sized section, but I can't begin to tell you how they were wrong. Well, I can start by saying the fabric was about as cheap and icky as it comes. Then trying them on was hilarious. The bottom part fit, I think, but the shoulders and arms were quite comic. The sleeves were either too small or the shoulders too narrow or to high or something. I have no idea. Needless to say it was quite comic and we didn't purchase anything there. On our way back out, we decided to give Sears a shot. For grins and giggles mostly I tried on some elastic waist pants in the regular plus size section. Amazingly enough, going up two sizes worked. They hips, butt and thighs don't look silly and there's plenty of room in the belly for expansion. And they were only $20 each! Our original thought was if they fit well enough, we would pick them up, get the panel fabric from JoAnn's and then make our own maternity pants. Well, we don't need to, at least at this stage. We may have to later on, but for $20 I'm not complaining. I mean, my regular jeans cost more and maternity pants are even worse. We got one denim and one khaki pair. I should be set for a while. (We shortened all three pair of pants when we got back to mom's... knowing full well if I had to do it, they'd sit on the sewing machine for several weeks until I really needed them, I'd pull the pins out and wear them anyhow.)
So, amazingly enough, today was quite successful. I also got a fabulous 50% alpaca/50% acrylic poncho that isn't too long! It was on major sale because the store was only in the mall for the holidays and they didn't want to have to pack everything and ship it back. I still could use a few shirts eventually, but I'm not too worried at the moment.
Well, I'm off to rot my brain on the DS for a while.
Peace to all and I hope you had a good weekend.

Things That Bug Me

I'm feeling in a bit of a rant mode. Over the past few days I've come across a few things that bug me more than others.
Most of them are petty little annoyances like people who don't pull up far enough in on-street parking and force my truck to take up two spots. Or people that don't think you mean it when you have your signal on because you're going to park, not turn at the corner 3/4 of a block away.
What really bugs me today is the fact that, as much as I want to support my local bookseller, I can't afford to.
I believe I mentioned Gak and I weren't going to get our books until today. This is because we pre-ordered them from the book store across the street. Gak has some credit there from trading in some used books, so we figured it wouldn't be too expensive. Well, Gak goes to pick them up today. They're $30 each and he can't use his store credit (because it's a brand new book). Uh... Gak only has $25 on him. I won't be home until after they close tonight. Therefore, Gak is going to go pick up at least one copy at Kmart where they're selling them for less than that. Admittedly, $30 is less than the cover price of $34. You can order them from Barnes and Noble for about $25 after shipping. I wanted to support the little book store on the corner, but I just can't afford to. I also can't wait for the book. I mean, I know I physically could, but I really am excited about reading it. It's just a shame that I have to go somewhere else. (I'm also a little cranky by the fact that if I'd known this was the case, Michelle, Gak and I would have gone to the book store on Sunday and picked up copies then.
So, trying to do the better thing and support local businesses but not being able to afford to is a big thing that bugs me. I understand how hard it is for them, my parents are business owners and I see the ups and downs they go through.
There were a few other little things that people do that bug me, but I can't remember them right now. I guess that means that they don't bug me enough to really worry about. (It probably has something to do with carry-on luggage or novice travelers going through security...)
Well, I'd best be getting back to work. I've got a few things to wrap up today before I'm out of the office for about the next week or so.
Peace to all and may you be able to support your local businesses!